A few years back, I got an ivory envelope--the
small envelope-- in the mail with the insignia from Stanford in the upper left corner. I drew a long breath and read what I had secretly suspected all along. Because of the many highly qualified applicants they receive each year they did not have a place for me in their Japanese Art History PhD program, but thanked me for applying. It was the first rejection letter I'd ever received from a college, and unfortunately won't be the last.
They didn't thank me for the $100 application fee, however. Since I was rejected, I kind of want that back. Nevertheless, so it was that I was rejected despite my small hopes of living for a few years in the Palo Alto sunshine, studying
Ukiyo-e to my little heart's content.
On an occasion or two, I've offered up that little heart to a you

ng man or two, and found rejection can come without an official ivory envelope. Depending on the occasion this has hurt sometimes more, sometimes less than Stanford's declaration that they could do without me. In fairness though, in this twisted game we call love and dating, I have had to offer up the proverbial ivory envelope to good men and turn their dear hearts away as well.
Rejection on a two way street at least seems fair, I suppose.
But recently I was rejected in a way that still has my head spinning a bit. Having moved into my snug little apartment, and commenced setting up house, I decided my happiness at home would be utterly completed with, you guessed it, wireless Internet. And so I applied to Comcast, the seemingly dominating force in the field of Internet and television service. After filling in all the correct boxes with my information and waiting 15 minutes to chat via i/m with a customer service representative named "Megan", I was informed that because I was not already a Comcast customer I was not eligible for Internet service.
I was in a new state of shock. I waited for the sales pitch-- "
But...if you sign up for a package...", but it didn't come. "Megan", politely put in the pre-prepared answer, "I'm sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused you, Shiloh. Can I be of help in any other way?"
So, you're saying I have to go to another service provider? I asked with the same feeling in my heart as those times I'd said,
So, you're saying you want to date other people? I got the same pre-prepared answer, no sales pitch, no alternative. Just a polite computer generated rejection.
Comcast rejected me. I didn't think this day would come. And so I go on, Internet-less and humbled, trying to get up the courage to ask Qwest if they will have me as a customer, take my monthly offering of $29.95
(plus taxes and fees), and make my home life complete. Until then, I will just have to ponder what I did wrong, how I could have proven myself to be a better potential customer. But I will also be wary to not fall in with those who cast their Internet payments before swine to get what they want now, while losing sight of their long term dreams. Rejection will not conquer me!