Phoenix: Part I

I'm in the Mesa/Tempe/Scottsdale area right now looking for housing. It is 111 degrees and I LOVE air conditioning more than I ever have!
Here are some highlights:

Our sweet, 4-star resort guest suite that we got dirt cheap thanks to hotwire.com!

An unwelcome, 3" guest in our sweet, 4-star resort guest suite that we got dirt cheap (I'm sure it was a fluke). Actually-- this is the second time in my life that I have had trouble with over sized beetles in nice hotel rooms. Maybe I'm the fluke... At least I didn't wake up to it crawling across me this time.

The Mesa Temple!

The Salt Creek Indian Reservation where we got lost looking for a church. Really, really lost.

Oh! And lest I forget! I didn't get a picture or an autograph-- but we saw David Cook at the Sky Harbor Airport! He was picking up his luggage from the same carousel! I felt bad bothering him-- but I think I should have taken a pic from across the way, or at least gone up and congratulated him. Apparently I've lost my courage when it comes to famous folks.

Sweaty Mess

Okay, okay. I said I understood that Phoenix was hot. I do. But the following information did nothing to help bolster my spirits. Vanessa, Evansville's got nothin' on my future home!

Here is the AP article in full:

P&G's Old Spice declares Phoenix the sweatiest city
6/25/2008, 7:40 a.m. EDT
The Associated Press

CINCINNATI (AP) — It may be "dry heat" out there, but Phoenix still leads a list of America's sweatiest cities.
The annual ranking comes from Old Spice deodorant, made by Cincinnati-based Procter and Gamble. The company says its findings are based on computer simulations of the amount of sweat an average person would have produced walking around in cities for an hour during June, July and August of last year.
Las Vegas is America's second-sweatiest city, followed by Tallahassee, Florida.

Besides using their product (which I really don't feel is an option for me until they develop "Old Spice for Her," Proctor and Gamble did provide the following ideas for staying cool in the summer in a "sweaty city" or even in one of those cities that didn't make the top 100 sweaty list:

Water – Drink plenty of fluids, at least eight to 10 glasses of water per day.
Choose Cotton – Wear clothing that breathes easier, such as cotton. Avoid
materials that encourage perspiration, such as polyester and nylon, as well as
dark colors.
Replace Salt and Minerals – Sweating removes salt and minerals from the
body. If participating in a strenuous activity where you anticipate heavy
perspiration, drink fruit juices and sports beverages to replace the lost minerals.

Hmm. Remarkably insightful. I'd like to add my own idea to the list:

Never Leave your Very Well Air-Conditioned House-Leaving your house will cause you to sweat. Staying inside will help you stay cool and therefore avoid sweating.

I wonder how my grad-school advisor will feel about me adopting this last tactic. ;)

Insomnia 101

Alot of people will try to tell you that insomnia is a terrible condition because of the sleepless nights, the tossing and turning in bed, the puffy, red eyes that pop out as you drag yourself into work. While these are all annoying parts of this particular ailment, the true reason insomnia is such a curse is that the programing on TV in the middle of the night is, well, let's just say, sub-par.

I'm not going to say I haven't learned things though. Even with our limited, rabbit-ears-supplied selection of a good 6 channels (if you can get those rabbit ears just right)I've picked up some real gems of knowledge.

For example-- for only 2 easy payments of only $19.95, I could get the chic shaper. This handy undergarment boosts a woman...well let's just say, where she may desire boosting, while also providing posture support. It apparently also causes her to trade in all of her normal cut shirts in favor of ridiculously low cut v-necks. That is quite the product.

I also watched a UVU psych 1010 tele-class. This was the highlight of the evening actually as I learned the differences between the various Cluster B Personality Disorders, including: Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic and Narcissistic. This was pretty cool actually. But I was disappointed that I couldn't diagnose anyone among my acquaintance with this limited knowledge. I'll have to try tuning in again some time. (The nerd in me kind of wanted to take out a notebook though and take notes, and I am of the firm opinion that no one should be taking notes at 3am.)

I also flipped past a minister and his wife with their "news report" which I think was mostly about other televangelists who are using their celebrity to gain lucre, which I frankly found ironic. Another station had a new business plan for only a $25 start up fee, where you would soon be making hundreds of thousands of dollars by selling their worthless trinkets and statuettes. I thought it was interesting that they offer a business support line where you can call in for advice at any time. If this system of selling is so great, why in the world would anyone work for them answering phones for minimum wage when they could be selling the trinkets for so much more? I'll let you ponder that one.

And so, lest you think the insomniac's nights are filled with boring novel reading, please be assured that there is alot of learning to do in the middle of the night, and support to be had from several different sources. ;)

Lost Sheep

My mom teaches a primary class-- I think the 7 and 8 year olds. Today they had a lesson on the one lost sheep. My mom told a story of some children who had a herd of sheep and had to round them up, but one didn't get rounded up. She posed the question to them, that if they had those sheep, and had rounded up all but one, why would they still go and look for it. With all those sheep, why would that one extra one matter?

A young man in the class raised his hand and answered, quite logically, that the reason you would go after the one sheep was probably because all the sheep you had were boys, and the lost sheep was a girl sheep. If you didn't go and get her, there would be no more sheep.

Now there is a young man with a mind for looking toward the future.

So, What do you do?

Things people have really said to me.

B1-So, What did you study?
S- Art History

B1- Cool! So do you do like oils, or ceramics, or what?....

B2- So, What did you study?

S- Art History

B2- Oh, Cool. So have you, like, been to The Louge?...

B3-So, What did you study?

S- Art History

B3- Hmm. So, I don't really get it. Do you just, like, look at art and stuff. Like, famous art?...

My profession remains a mystery! ;)

Na na na na, Na na na na, Hey hey hey, Gooooodbye!

131-92. Beautiful numbers for the Boston Celtics tonight, as they blew the Lakers out of the water and took the NBA 2008 National Championship! I stayed at the gym an extra hour riding some exercise bike to watch the end of the game. I've never been a huge Celtics fan-- but I was proud of this team tonight. Not only because they brought down the team I happen to despise, but because they seemed to lack the cockiness of alot of teams-- they played together and it was great. Doc Rivers deserved this championship. The Celtics seem like a decent buch of players. I was as happy as I could be for a team (other than the Jazz of course!) to win.

Too Modest?!

I was searching on the internet tonight for modest swimwear, after the painful realization that I had waited to long to get the tankini top I meant to buy from Shade Clothing, and they ran out of my size and color. :(

I was surprised at what I found in my search. I didn't think I would find suits I thought were maybe too modest...

Here is one modest suit option from ModestSwimwear.



Another from SwimModest.



I did finally find this great site that has a list of swim shops that sold suits that were more along the lines of what I was thinking.

I ended up with this cute vintage suit from modbe. Hope I like it!

The Treachery of Images

René Magritte, La Trahison des Images, 1928-9.

Genée Cosden , This is not a Pipe, 2007

Naughty and Nice: An Ode to Watson

Some say that Watson's naughty,

Some say he's nice.

From what I've seen of pluck and spice,

I hold with those who favor nice.

But if I had to walk out barefoot

I think I know enough of pain

To say that for judgement naughty

Is also true

And would suffice.

--Ode inspired by Watson, Julianne, Rebecca and Robert Frost.

We Love Lincoln!

I got to meet Seth and Maria's cute little Lincoln on Sunday! And, oh, how we love Lincoln!!

Tim loves Lincoln-- he just isn't quite sure what to do with him yet.

Look how cute those cheeks are!!
And check out Lincoln's cool kicks!
Great-Grandma Jones really, really loves Lincoln!!

Sweet Stuff I Saw in the Spring!

May 3, 2008
Provo River Parkway
I saw signs of a recent beaver gnaw-fest! Check out those tooth-marks.
A nice high schooler on a long board offered to let me take his photo as well. I declined the offer.



May 19, 2008
BYU Duck Pond
I saw some very newly hatched ducklings and some cool turtles. I also ran into my friends Rebecca and Neil (not pictured). Great trip to the duck pond.

I was once teased, after a thrilling day at the beach, in San Diego, where I observed a dolphin, and little clams in the sand blowing bubbles, and sea weed, and cool rocks, and cool shells, and also made myself braided jewelry out of long grass, that I "was like a little kid".

It's true. I'm not going to hide it. I love stuff like this!

Art-O-Meter!!!

Art-O-Meter is a device that measures the quality of an art piece. It bases its evaluation on the amount of time that people spend in front of an artwork compared to the total time of exhibition. The measurements are graphically represented by comments and a 5 star rating system. [movie] (Marcelo Coelho/ via Gadget Collection)

Finally!!! A scientific device to measure the worth of art!! I'm only surprised it took this long!! How in the world is a viewer supposed to know how to feel about an art work, without a scientific evaluation of it?

There are already so many people only in art for the "names". Squinting to see the name of the artist to decide if a piece is worth viewing or not. Monet, Van Gogh, Rembrandt-- we know these names. But Fra Fillipo Lippi, Claesz, Morisso? Who are these people and why should I give them the time of day unless the Art-O-Meter does??

I do want to know how this device specifically measures the time people spend in front of an art work. Is it the average time per person, or consistent viewership?? I think this will settle, once and for all, the question of the true value of the Mona Lisa (a.k.a. La Gioconda).

If it is valued based on number of people seeing it, or consistent time of any number of people standing in front of it, it is, hands down, the best piece of art in the world. If, however, it is based on average time of each individual viewer (i.e. the time it takes to snap your picture and get back to the tour bus) then is will be the worst piece of art in the world. I cannot wait for the results here!!!

Ahh! Science and Art united at last!

Idioms Proved True

There are many phrases we use to describe how we feel. Many are idioms that have worked their way through our changing language and no longer retain the reference to their original source, but are understood nonetheless. Cat's got your tongue. Chip on his shoulder. Foam at the mouth.

Over the years, I've had occasion to realise that some seemingly funny statements stem in fact from truth rather than obscure, long-lost references.

Knees Knocking. I believed this was only as true as the cat getting you tongue. But when I gave a talk for the first time, many years ago, I was surprised to find that behind the pulpit, my legs were indeed shaking so badly that my knees were hitting together. Hopefully the bishopric appreciated the fact that I didn't fall over in addition to shaking at this rate. I was in awe that this phrase simply described an actually possible event rather than an exaggerated concept.

Broken Heart. This too I thought was a mere description that had nothing to do with actual pain. I am of course not trying to convince you that that organ in your chest in fact breaks or tears or is severed in anyway. However, I remember being amazed again that there was actual, and very real pain in my chest when my first boyfriend told me it was over (again, so many years ago). We speak of giving our hearts, protecting our hearts in this same vein-- referencing the true pain that can come to our chests.

Hands that Hang Down. This was another phrase I felt referred merely to the fact that when one is discouraged or sad, they let their arms hang at their sides. I believed it was symbolic and had no further meaning than this. I have had occasion in life though to feel a real weight in my hands when the world seemed too much for me. I learned how much one could really do by starting with this weight for someone and moving on to the deeper sources of weight.

I am always amazed at how much experience can teach us, even, and maybe especially, difficult experience.

For Julianne

Available as a T-shirt at http://www.threadless.com/

Rightful Reunion

I was overjoyed to read today that the children of the Texas FLDS families will be returning home. I had a sudden burst of faith in our judicial system that I think I needed. I just hope the trauma these children went through hasn't done irreparable damage, I hope that going home will heal their fragile little souls.

I do not believe that polygamy should be practiced-- it is illegal. I do not think young girls should be forced to marry--it is evil besides being illegal. I do not think that abusive parents should go without punishment. I also do not believe that a whole community should be singled out and every parent in that community accused of being abusive based on limited information or the existence of some abusive parents in the community.

My thanks to the Supreme Court for righting this wrong.