Consolation

I am surprised that I haven't shared this picture earlier. My friend, Ansally, at work discovered it probably 2 years ago. I think it is a fabulous photo.

President Oaks consoles quarterback Mark Giles after the Cougars' Fiesta Bowl loss,

December 28, 1974

Between the pathos, chest hair and gingham pants I can never say what I love most about this photo. It is a priceless piece of BYU football history though. The new description on the BYU Special Collections site explains:

"In the dressing room after the Cougar's 16-6 loss in the 1974 Fiesta Bowl, President Oaks consoled Mark Giles, BYU's other quarterback, who played the entire game after Sheide was injured. Giles played a heroic game in the Cougar's losing effort, powering the team in several long drives. The game was closer than the score indicated: 10-6 down to the last minute in a defensive battle that was telecast to millions nationally over Columbia Broadcasting System. Coach LaVell Edwards said 'We beat them physically' and the Cougars led in almost every statistic but the score. BYU led in first downs 17-14, passing yardage 181-77, and the total yards 301-214."

How I Lost my Baby

Even good relationships can come to an end. It was a cold January and my baby was on his way to Detroit. I'd cried and pleaded, but there was just no way to stop this from happening, and no way to know the bitter ending that was coming. No one really understood what I was losing. We'd gone a lot of miles together, through good times and bad. It seemed unreal that we weren't together anymore. My mom set me up with someone new, but it just wasn't the same. And I thought my baby was coming back to me-- just six months or so in Detroit and then we would be together again.

But then I got the call. Somewhere outside of Denver the axle on the truck he was riding in had broken and subsequently dragged along the freeway, sending sparks into the truck and starting everything on fire.

And that is how I lost my baby.

My little, beautiful, black '97 Honda CR-V.

My mom insisted that I loan it to my sister when she moved to Detroit, until she got a car of her own. (You know how those pot holes in Detroit can be!). But things didn't turn out so well. Of course my sister got the worst end of the deal-- since all of her things were on the moving truck as well. What fire didn't get, smoke and water helped to destroy.

My mom let me take her car in the meantime, and I was grateful, but I really did have a special bond with that CR-V. I was really planning on driving it until it went to that big raceway in the sky. It was the perfect size and the perfect amount of sportiness. It had just enough miles and just enough dings and scratches to be of little value to anyone but myself. And it fit my grad student persona so well-- an older, but cool and spunky, pseudo-SUV.

Someday, when I get a real job (cross your fingers), I'm going to buy another one. I may upgrade several years or so (since we're going with the dream-of-a-real-job scenario), but I still love the Honda CR-V. I don't expect that the new car will fully replace that hole in my heart created when I got the call about the fire outside of Denver, but I think it will come close.

A WalMart Experience

The following conversation ensued with an overly chatty young checker at WalMart when I was purchasing certain feminine items. [Brackets indicate what I refrained from saying out loud.]

Checker: Oh man! Is it that time of the month?!

Shiloh: [I'm so glad no one is behind me in line] um, oh, yep.

C: I hate that! Oh! If I could kill it I so would... I mean, ohh!!

S: [kill it?! hmm, okay] Yeah...

C: I guess the bad part would be you wouldn't know when you were pregnant. I mean, you could just be going along and pregnant. But you wouldn't know.

S: [I'm so glad this has never been a problem for me] That is true. There is an upside.

C: I had my first baby when I was seventeen.

S: [wow--where did that come from!] oh, wow, that must have been hard...

C: No. Not really. It was mostly hard for my boyfriend...

S: Oh...

C: You know, he just wasn't really ready for it emotionally. You know how men are...

S: Um, yeah.

C: Well, thanks, have a good night!

S: You too. [My life could be oh so different]

Make No Mistake About It

"Make no mistake about it, brothers and sisters, in the months and years ahead, events are likely to require each member to decide whether or not he will follow the First Presidency. Members will find it more difficult to halt longer between two opinions. President Marion G. Romney said, many years ago, that he had 'never hesitated to follow the counsel of the Authorities of the Church even though it crossed my social, professional or political life.'

"This is hard doctrine, but it is particularly vital doctrine in a society which is becoming more wicked. In short, brothers and sisters, not being ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ includes not being ashamed of the prophets of Jesus Christ. . . . Your discipleship may see the time when such religious convictions are discounted. . . . This new irreligious imperialism seeks to disallow certain opinions simply because those opinions grow out of religious convictions.

"Resistance to abortion will be seen as primitive. Concern over the institution of the family will be viewed as untrendy and unenlightened.... Before the ultimate victory of the forces of righteousness, some skirmishes will be lost. Even in these, however, let us leave a record so that the choices are clear, letting others do as they will in the face of prophetic counsel. There will also be times, happily, when a minor defeat seems probable, but others will step forward, having been rallied to rightness by what we do. We will know the joy, on occasion, of having awakened a slumbering majority of the decent people of all races and creeds which was, till then, unconscious of itself. Jesus said that when the fig trees put forth their leaves, 'summer is nigh.' Thus warned that summer is upon us, let us not then complain of the heat."

--Elder Neal A. Maxwell, BYU devotional address, Oct 10, 1978

Got a Chaperone?

So, are we still on for...?

There are a few phrases in the English language which cause me to go into an intense state of paranoia. There is no logically or useful reason for this, it is just one of the pleasant idiosyncrasies that make us all unique.

One of these phrases for me is "So, are we still on for [such-and-such and activity (that, by the way, we already planned way before now)]?" The ultimate irony of this paranoia comes from the fact that I use this sentence as a common turn of phrase without thinking about it or batting an eyelash. But when the tables are turned, things in my head start to go amiss, whether its my mom or my love interest, I just don't care for the phrase and the ensuing internal battle to derive deeper meaning where there usually is none.

In the delusional state that is prompted upon hearing these words I tend to think one of two things:

1) The person themselves is not actually interested in doing whatever activity we had set up and is hoping that by crafting the sentence in this manner that I will catch on and call things off so that they don't have to a) be rude and do it themselves, or b) (which is worse) endure the activity with me.

-or-

2) I have somehow accidentally and unintentionally given the person a non-verbal cue that I am no longer interested in the activity we had planned and/or spending time with them and they are trying to give me an out because they don't want to force me into an activity I am not interested in.

I am completely aware that "So, are we still on for [such-and-such an activity]?", (except in cases where there was a previously established possible conflict) really is only a way to introduce a topic and confirm plans. Nevertheless my brain continues to betray me. Just so you know, if I ever use this phrase on you, I really just want to bring up the topic, and if you've got any hints to calm my paranoid delving into common phrase meaning, I would love to have them!

Terry Warner

I just wanted to help spread the word to any of you who worked at EiZ. Please pass on the information to anyone you know who may have been missed.